I'm sticking with Rick Santorum and God.
But I've got to tell, you, it really tickled me the other night when Newt blew out the totally liberal CNN media when they attacked him with that below-the-belt question, if you know what I mean, about his ex-wife. I mean, he really threw it back in their faces, didn't he? And I was glad to see that all those Christians in that audience didn't let that liberal media get by with a darn thing. Who are they, to bring up some phony character issue?
Okay, he's had three wives. (Oh, I know, Ima Gine is a little bit ticked -- well, actually, plenty ticked -- about that. But she has sense enough to hold her tongue on this one.) Well, I say, just speaking personally between you and me, well, Rush Limbaugh has had four, and is anyone holding that against him? So this is all just another liberal double standard, if you ask me.
Wasn't it Newt, after all, who led that courageous impeachment fight against Bill Clinton? That right there ought to tell you everything that you need to know about Newt's character. And hey, if you want to hit below the belt, CNN, I can tell you that old Newt can do a little bit of that himself, so watch out, little boys, because Newt can really show you how the game is played! Just like he did the other night.
And then all those Christians went out and put Newt right over the top of everybody -- Mitt and everybody! Wasn't that a sight? I could almost hear God telling Rick, "Step aside for just a moment, Rick. This is important. Watch Me just stick it in their liberal eyes!"
Talk about Mine Eyes Have Seen The Glory -- it was like seeing the Armies of the Lord rise up to send them a message, if you know what I mean. (I'm talking about the liberals here, now. I'm not saying anything against Romney, per se.)
Speaking about the Lord, I noticed that Goofy's big favorite, R-n P--l, came in a poor fourth in South Carolina. Do you think maybe the Lord is trying to tell him something? Like, if you can't win the race, get out of the kitchen?
I mean really. Watching R-n P--l shamelessly playing his "Jesus card" with that silly business about the Golden Rule. I was glad to see that the real Christians there saw through that obvious play. No wonder the Lord punished him with a fourth place finish -- after Rick Santorum, I might add.
Which brings me back to Rick. I've been thinking about what God said to the Christian leaders who met "at the Summit" in Texas a couple of weeks ago. Notice that He said, "It's Rick." He didn't say, "It's Rick for President." I've been thinking, maybe, He meant it's Rick for Vice President. I'm okay with that.
That leaves plenty of room for Newt. Or even Mitt.
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For fun, this was